Results day...

Okay, I admit it
I Over- Worried myself.... Big time :)
I honestly can say that I am chuffed with what I got, I'm so syked to have been like the 3rd highest achiever in the school....Bloody hell!

GCSE;
English Lit: A*
English Lan: A
Maths; A
Biology: A
Chemistry: A
Physics: A*
Geography: A*
Photography: A*
French:B
ICT: B
R.E: A
Citizen: A
Btec art and design textiles; D* (equal to two A*'s at GCSE!)

AS Level;
Critical Thinking: C

And All the PHSE certificate in prep for working life, and that shite that will never come in use but looks nice on paper

I honestly cannot get over it, I was feeling sick, and scared and shaking like a leaf! And now i feel like I can relax, even if its just for a little while!

Reason to smile for the next 2 weeks: I DID well!!!
The final total; 6 A*'s, 6 A's and 2 B's

Nerves are getting the better of me...

Results day tomorrow, I'll either be over-joyed and upset and feeling like I've underachieved.
I'm rather nauseous, and I should be happy...
Why can't I just smile?

Favourite things....

Okay, so I'm a Little late with my fave things list, but here goes...

I was going to give a dead witty answer and say i only have one favourite thing; called my life but instead i shall be a materialistic human and give a list of things that i actually love of course with justification.

- 3OH!3- streets of gold CD.
This CD is everything at the moment, i couldn't care less if it had a crap rating in NME magazine, the lyrics and everything are inspiring me to say fuck you to those people that i just know i should but never could say it to. Nat and Sean, you may be classed as "rap/hip/hop" on my itunes, but seriously, you are alternative to me all the way guys! Your voices inspire me to be who i am today.

-My tattoo
Okay, so this is slightly weird, but i have a peace symbol on the inside of my right wrist, its not even a week old yet but i really do adore it. it stands for everything i believe in about pacifism and not using physical violence to resolve a conflict.

-My Beanie hat
I bought this a few years ago, its black and woolly and dead cosy in the winter, it really does help when you're having a bad hair day, and i cant wait to wear it in college this autumn/winter.

-My Pandora bracelet
This also means alot to me, my dad bought it me a week ago to try and replace the old fake one i got given, and I was so touched by the fact he understood how much it meant to me. Each one of the charms I have or will buy is meaningful to my life and that's why i feel when its done it really will sum up me as a person.

-my grandparents
I know these are really a thing, but my grandparents are pretty amazing. I can talk to my gran about absolutely anything and everything that i need to talk about, whether its being deadly serious or silly.

-My I-pod
I really couldn't live without this, i love to listen to music on the go and I usually end up singing or dancing in public because I'm dead daft and i find it rather uplifting.

-Books; Hannibal Rising, Marshmallows for breakfast, the great expectations, anything by Shakespeare.
Recently i promised myself i would read a lot more classical literature, and I intend to carry out that promise. I find that reading allows me to escape to a world where anything could happen, where there are villains and heroes, good and bad times and you feel engrossed in the characters life. I read alot of books so I find it hard to name favourite ones but i find Thomas Harris is a literature genius and really stands out to me at the moment.

- Superman Hoodie/Tee's
If you're not dead familiar with me, you won't know that I am undoubtedly obsessed with anything superman, from tee's to hoodies, belts to shoes. I adore superman. I could be his Lois Laine I promise you.

And thats all i can think of at the moment, but I shall be sure to add to it later, and probably will take a photo just to spice up this blog a little!

Something New.

I'm feeling slightly apprehensive about results day now, I'm dreading going, seeing whats on that tiny bit of paper and everything I've wanted for years being taken away. I feel nauseous thinking about it.
The boy problem isnt helping, but i'm going to get my stuff back, see him, not kill him or injure him due to the fact i might damage myself more seriously and take a deep breath to face him.

On the brighter side, i got my tattoo done. I absoloutely adore it!

This is me, I love myself, yeah fuck everybody else.

I know for a fact you'll read this, and that's why I'm writing it, because i want you to read it.

Wow, Smooth move there, i trusted you with everything, and you've just gone and done what i knew you would to me, thanks a fucking lot. I really really was stupid to believe you actually gave a fuck about me, and that you'd wait. Utter Bullshit.
And that's why I'm mad, you said i was everything, lets be fair, really I was nothing to you. You're my biggest mistake so far, meeting you was a bad move, i wish i never had and i hope your fucking happy, you deserve it.

Sorry again my lovely followers, I'm just venting how angry and used I feel.

On the brighter side, I go on holiday for 5 days tomorrow, so I can get away from him and everything.

A note to you my dear;

Fuck You (:

Shooting stars and suchlike....

I'm staying up all night to watch this meteor shower. I'm dying to see tonnes, the count so far is two, but we've really clouded over and you cant see them. I shall wait until peak times at half 12 till 3am to do the rest of my stargazing.
Please feel free to whisk me off to an asylum 'cause my neighbours are looking at me like a nutter. I feel like a nutter! But these meteors, they make me feel so small and insignificant. My problems are irrelevant, there are bigger and more important, beautiful and breathtaking things out there which are not involved in my tightly woven life. It's time to start unpicking the threads, unwinding the bobbin and start afresh with a new perspective i think...

You know sometimes, the things you think you'll regret, you actually don't when you do them....I've found that out recently, But I know deep down that's how mistakes will be made...Kinda too late for that, especially with him

Back home again.

I reckon I'm living in a dream, and I'm going to wake up shortly
probably on results day, a sick feeling swirls in my stomach
and takes over me,my palms sweat and my heart beats like a bass
drum in my chest, I'm afraid of failure. Its not an option for me...

I WILL do my favourite things list soon! :) promise!